


Paid Research Opportunity

by allostatic, snowapples



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - College/University, Canon Compliant, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Pining, Romantic Couples Study, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, tropes galore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 11:58:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10921353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allostatic/pseuds/allostatic, https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowapples/pseuds/snowapples
Summary: In their second year of university and completely broke, Oikawa convinces Iwaizumi to be his fake boyfriend so they can earn money from a romantic couples study.





	Paid Research Opportunity

**Author's Note:**

> Premise was inspired by [this post.](http://lesbianrey.tumblr.com/post/139998890690/looks-like-the-perfect-opportunity-for-the-fake/)

It was two weeks into their second year of university, and things were tight. ~~~~

Oikawa, through absolutely no fault of his own, had lost his job. The perfect job for him—MC of the university karaoke night, charming the crowds with his smooth voice and dazzling smile, leaving with at least five phone numbers each night—and he lost it.

In Oikawa’s defence, no one had told him he wasn’t allowed to accept alcoholic drinks while working. And the girl buying was _very_ hot. Really, it was all quite hilarious.

Unfortunately, Iwaizumi didn’t quite see eye to eye with Oikawa on the hilarity.

Shortly before Oikawa’s firing, the café Iwaizumi worked at had closed down, and so, things were tight. Money was tight, and the ass up which Iwaizumi kept a stick was tight.

Oikawa was taking it all in stride. He had savings and the campus was always likely to have jobs going, so what was the harm? He was gorgeous, smart, and affable, he would have a job in no time. The only thing really pressing him was that Iwaizumi could no longer get him cheap coffee. Other than that? It was fine. Just a little extra time for Oikawa to perfect his Instagram aesthetic.

“Let’s get an apartment instead of living in the shitty dorms, _he said_ ,” Iwaizumi muttered to himself, stomping around the kitchen. “We’ll be so much better off, _he said_.”

Oikawa tilted his head back on the couch arm and watched Iwaizumi frown at the jar of instant coffee.

“I predicted your premature frown lines to hit you in four years, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa hummed. “But now I’m thinking they might come in next week.”

Iwaizumi paused to glare at him over the counter. Oikawa just gave him a radiant smile.

“You know,” Iwaizumi said, “I wouldn’t be frowning at this shitty coffee if you weren’t an alcoholic.”

“Rude, Iwa-chan, I’m not an alcoholic.” Oikawa stretched out and then curled back into the couch with his feet up. “I was much more interested in the pretty girl than the drink. It’s not my fault the bar has stupid rules.”

“Not drinking on the job is a pretty standard rule everywhere.”

Oikawa shot him a glare. “No wonder the café closed down, all your co-workers couldn’t cope with you sober.”

Iwaizumi’s frown stayed in place, trained on the coffee, but Oikawa saw the corner of his mouth twitching.

“Go back to your selfies, asshole.”

“Only because I know you love them so much,” Oikawa sang.

“You wish.”

Oikawa hummed and focused his attention back to his phone. He had, indeed, been taking selfies before Iwaizumi’s grumbling interrupted him. The look he was currently cultivating online was what he liked to call Cosy Boys in Jumpers. He was easing followers out of winter, one soft selfie at a time. And since he was currently in a cosy jumper, curled up on the couch, and having an even better than usual hair day, it seemed only natural to utilise the opportunity.

He slid further down the couch until he was lying down, peering with doe eyes at the camera. Unfortunately, the lighting was shit.

“Iwa-chan.”

“What?” came Iwaizumi’s annoyed voice.

“Can you build me a skylight?”

“What?” said Iwaizumi again, slightly more annoyed.

“A skylight,” Oikawa repeated. “The lighting is shitty. I need sunlight to be coming through some blinds, looking all stripy and glowy.”

“You need to get out of the house.” Iwaizumi appeared, cup of bad coffee in hand. He shoved Oikawa’s legs off the couch and sat down. Oikawa pouted and plonked his legs over Iwaizumi’s lap, spilling a drop of coffee when the movement jostled Iwaizumi. Oikawa smiled angelically at the scowl aimed his way.

Iwaizumi sighed. “Just take the picture somewhere else.”

“But, Iwa-chan! The couch is part of my cosy aesthetic!”

Iwaizumi sighed again and looked at the ceiling. “I honestly wish the word aesthetic would never come out of your mouth again.” He looked back down at Oikawa. “Did you ever consider that the reason you’re soulless is because every time you take a new picture of yourself, a tiny bit of the humanity normal people were born with just . . .” he gestured off into the distance with his hand, “gets sucked away?”

“Yes. That’s why I keep doing it, so I can annoy you better.”

Iwaizumi snorted softly and Oikawa felt a slight rush of achievement, but it passed quickly. He tilted his head back into the couch cushions and closed his eyes. Iwaizumi’s comment stung a little too much, and if he was being honest with himself, he knew why. 

Oikawa was bored. Bored with his days, bored with his nights, bored with the shitty instant coffee, bored with his lack of dates—just bored with his life.

It was very possible Oikawa missed his job more than he let on, and he was very possibly blue about it.

Oikawa jumped up off the couch, barely missing Iwaizumi’s mug with his foot. “I’m going out!”

“I’m _free_ ,” Iwaizumi whispered.

Oikawa stuck his tongue out, grabbing his wallet and coat, and headed for the door.

“Have fun with your shitty coffee, Iwa-chan.”

“Don’t come back without a source of income, Shittykawa.”

* * * 

The spring weather was still biting in April, but the sun was peeking out by the time Oikawa reached the campus. He sat himself down on a bench and stretched out, closing his eyes and tilting his head toward the sky. He had watched Kenma do this quietly before and decided if cats were solar powered, maybe he could be too.

The sun hit his skin gently, the otherwise brisk weather stopping him from melting away. Moments like this were rare—when the air was cool but the sun was warm and Oikawa could be the perfect temperature. He let out a sigh.

Iwaizumi was right; he did need to find a job.

He wasn’t the only one—Iwaizumi needed a new job too—but when Oikawa was alone he could admit that he’d been slacking. The karaoke nights made him feel invigorated. He was impressive there, he was good at it. The crowds loved him behind the microphone, and he could bring out the best from every drunken, nervous singer with his smile and a wink. He practically had a fan club. And he always had enough dates to distract him from the fact that he never seemed to like any of his dates.

Where else would he be able to perform like that and feel alive? He needed a stage.

Oikawa took a deep breath in and opened his eyes, sitting up straight. He needed money more.

All of the local cafés did their hiring at the end of March. Iwaizumi might not find an opening for a while yet, and with that would come tight-assed Iwa-chan, who would hide his anxiety under an extra layer of grumpiness. Oikawa didn’t like anxious Iwaizumi.

A vibrating in Oikawa’s pocket startled him out of his daze. He pulled out his phone and smiled.

“I said we couldn’t hang until you fix that hair of yours!” Oikawa chirped.

“And I said we couldn’t hang until you fix that personality of yours,” Kuroo replied. Oikawa could hear his smirk over the phone, equal parts irritating and amusing. “Yet, here I am, taking pity on you and calling first.”

“My personality is radiant, Kuroo.”

“Radiant as the sun. Stand too close and get burned.” Kuroo paused and Oikawa could hear balls bouncing faintly in the background, then a door closing. He bit his lip. “You on campus?”

Oikawa shook himself. “Yep! Spending time with my mother outside building seven.”

“Your mother?”

“The radiant sun! Haven’t you seen the weather? She’s giving me lessons on burning people so I can punish you for your terrible hair.”

Kuroo snorted. “I’m just leaving building eight, let me buy you a coffee.”

Oikawa felt every inch of himself light up. Solar powered healing was bullshit, it was nothing compared to the promise of a real coffee. “Kuro, have I ever told you I love you?”

“Not nearly enough. I’ll meet you at the usual place.”

“Bye!”

Oikawa stood and stretched, beaming. He was going to order the most elaborate and expensive coffee possible. Maybe see if he could con his way to a pastry. Kuroo owed him at least five drinks from his old job.

He made his way over, humming to himself and winking at three attractive students. He reached the café first and waited outside. There was a noticeboard by the door, covered in signs that read _Roommate Wanted_ and _$5 Cowboy Shots 1 st of May_.

Oikawa hovered, his gut winding itself in knots. He knew if he checked he would find job vacancies. He looked hopefully around for Kuroo, for an excuse to avoid it, but there was nothing there. He sighed. It was time.

Grinding his teeth, Oikawa scanned over the noticeboard. It was filled with typical listings like _Cleaner, Part-time_ and _Data Entry 10hr/w_. He tapped his foot impatiently. It’s not that Oikawa couldn’t do these jobs; he could suck it up and give it his all if he needed, but he was bitter. He eyed the sports corner of the board, chewing his lip at the poster for the—

“Hey, hey, hey!”

Oikawa jumped and turned around to see Kuroo. “Your Bokuto impression is getting too good,” he said.

Kuroo smiled. “It better be, I hear it twenty times a day. Shall we?” He nodded to the door.

Oikawa remembered the beauty of coffee and lit up. “Real coffee!” he sang. “You’re buying me whatever I want, Kuro, you owe me and I’m poor and I’ve been living off instant crap. I’m gonna drink you out of house and home!”

Kuroo rolled his eyes and turned towards the door. Oikawa followed suit, his eyes glossed over the noticeboard one last time and then he stopped in his tracks.

**_PAID RESEARCH OPPORTUNITY_ **

Romantic Couples Study

_You and your partner are eligible to participate if you:_

\- Are in a committed, monogamous romantic relationship  
\- Have been dating for at least six months  
\- Are currently living together  
\- Are both over the age of 18

_The study involves . . ._

Oikawa felt the universe aligning, his best idea in at least a month hitting him. He ripped the page from the board in an instant.

“Kuro . . . I think I’ve just found my saving grace.”

Kuroo came up behind him and peered over his shoulder. Oikawa’s face was starting to hurt from smiling, the air of a manic genius setting over him.

“What’s that?” Kuroo asked.

“You know how I’m broke, and Iwa-chan’s broke?”

Kuroo looked at Oikawa’s face, then down at the paper, then back at his face. Oikawa saw the moment Kuroo knew exactly what he was planning.

“He’ll never agree to it.”

Oikawa grinned. “I’ll make him agree to it.”

**Author's Note:**

> hi y'all I've never posted fic for haikyuu before and I'm terrified ha ha ha help
> 
> anyway you can expect many fake relationship classic tropes in this fic so it's gonna be fun, let me know if you like it and I'm on tumblr over [here.](http://iwachanswife.tumblr.com/) thank you for reading !!


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